There is a TIME for everything
Absolutely, that's such a powerful thought. "There is a time for everything" speaks to the natural rhythm of life—how everything unfolds in its own season, whether it's growth, rest, change, or reflection. It's a reminder to embrace the present and trust that things will happen when they're meant to. Do you feel like you're in a certain "time" or season of your life right now?
The process of losing someone close is incredibly difficult, and it affects us in so many layers—emotionally, mentally, physically, and even spiritually. There’s no one “right” way to go through it, and everyone experiences grief in their own way, but there are some common stages and feelings that many people go through when someone they love dies.
1. Shock and Disbelief:
When you first learn of the death, it can feel like the world stops. It might be hard to accept, and for a while, it might feel unreal. You may feel numb, disconnected from reality, or have trouble processing what’s happened. Your mind might try to rationalize or reject the idea that the person is gone.
2. Denial and Isolation:
Many people find themselves isolating after the loss, not wanting to face the reality. They might find themselves thinking they’ll see or hear that person again, or they may continue with old habits like expecting a call or a visit from them. During this time, you may also feel a sense of loneliness or isolation, even though others around you might try to offer comfort.
3. Anger and Frustration:
Grief can often be accompanied by intense feelings of anger—anger at the situation, at yourself, at others, or even at the person who has passed for leaving you behind. It’s a normal reaction to the feeling of powerlessness and helplessness that can come with death. Sometimes, this anger is directed inward or might feel like frustration about the unfairness of it all.
4. Bargaining:
Some people may experience a period where they mentally bargain—wondering if they could have done something differently to prevent the loss. You might have thoughts like, “If only I had said this,” or “If only we had more time.” It’s a way of wishing things could be different or of trying to regain some control over the situation.
5. Depression and Sadness:
The overwhelming sadness of losing someone can be crushing. You might feel deep sorrow, emptiness, and a loss of purpose or direction. It’s common to experience physical symptoms of grief during this time as well—fatigue, loss of appetite, trouble sleeping. The reality that they are gone may settle in more deeply.
6. Acceptance:
Eventually, some people come to a place of acceptance. This doesn’t mean you stop feeling the loss, but you begin to find ways to adjust to life without them. You might start finding a new routine or a new understanding of how to live without that person. There may be moments of peace, where you reflect on the love or the connection you shared.
Throughout this process, grief is often non-linear. You may move back and forth between these stages or experience them in a different order. There’s no timeline for grief—it takes as long as it takes, and it can come in waves, sometimes unexpectedly.
Physical and Emotional Effects:
Grief affects you not only emotionally but also physically. You might feel physically exhausted, or like your body’s energy has been drained. Emotionally, the impact can be profound—sometimes causing feelings of disorientation, anxiety, or even guilt. People often say they feel like they are in a fog during this time, or like they're on autopilot, going through the motions without really being present.
Supporting Yourself Through Loss:
Allow Yourself to Feel: Grief is a complex emotion, and it’s important to give yourself permission to feel whatever comes up. It’s normal to feel a wide range of emotions, and there is no “right” way to grieve.
Lean on Support Systems: Whether it’s friends, family, or professional counselors, it’s helpful to reach out to people you trust. Talking about your feelings can help lighten the emotional load, even if it’s just a little.
Take Care of Yourself: When grieving, it’s easy to neglect your physical needs. Eating well, getting rest, and even taking walks can help you through the hardest moments.
Memorializing and Remembering: Many people find comfort in creating ways to remember the person who has passed—whether it’s through a memorial, writing about them, or keeping certain traditions alive. These acts can help keep their memory alive in your heart.
Loss is never easy, and it can sometimes feel overwhelming. If this is something you are currently experiencing, I’m really sorry you’re going through it. Please don’t hesitate to lean on those around you, or seek help from a counselor or support group. It’s okay to ask for help during a time like this.
Everyone goes through things differently. I wanted to take some time and share this with you.
Someone very close to me has passed aways, as today was very hard for me. As i was on the phone most of the day.
Let me back up, I was in search for a new computer for them. As their computer has quit working. Tried many times to call since Wednesday. I'll get back to this..... I stopped by today (Friday) to find them dead. This was both a blessing and a curse.
First off it was a blessing, as they passed in their sleep with no pain. This is per the medical people on site. Their last food entry was Wednesday at 4pm with high blood sugar. However, the blood sugar was lower then it has been. So it appears they ate and might not have been feeling well, so went to bed early to never wake up again.
Now the curse comes three days later when I came in to check on them and upon entering the alarm was going off. Which tells me it has been going off since Thursday morning. Then finding them in their bed with blood coming out of their eyes and nose. Also cold to the touch. Finding this myself was really hard, so all day I have been making phone calls, not getting anything done as far as cleaning or going through things.
This is a season and it will pass. However, I will need time. These next couple weeks I will try to go through things and figure things out best I can. Then after this stage I will have to take their ashes with me to Michigan to honor their wishes. This will be a time of prayer and full filling their wishes. Once I get back, I will be back to my full self.
What this means is, I could use a lot of support from all of you. First off, your prayers for strength, wisdom, and resources. Second, from my friends to support me in any way you can.
I will still be here for you, the best way I can, so in this time please allow me a little room. I will be giving a lot away to family that are in need. So if you are local and in need, reach out and I will let you come and get it.
I love you all as you mean a great deal to me. Thank you for your support and allowing me to heal.
The one thing I can say God has got this, and because each of you; everything is going to be ok.
